Absent Presence

Last month we celebrated my husband's Aunt and Uncle's 70th Wedding Anniversary.  It was a diverse gathering of family and friends, aged twenty to ninety who came to rejoice with two people who had dedicated their lives to each other, their family, and to education. This was a group of well-educated, bright, and interesting people.

As I thought back through the evening, it hit me that something was missing from this undoubtedly technology-savvy group; no iPhones or other such devices were attached to anyones' hand!
They were actually talking with each other, laughing at witty comments, and focusing on the people sitting with them. I wrote one of my first blogs on Sept. 5, 2011 about this problem. The following is a paragraph from that blog:

"Even the smaller children have their battery-operated games with them. In any given booth at a restaurant these days you’ll find at least two adults who are either talking to or texting with other people, and a child or two who either:  Stare off into space because they are being totally ignored, play a game alone, or are fighting with each other over whose turn it is to play."

An interesting video has surfaced on FaceBook which shows several scenarios of device-use. One which stood out the most to me was a clip of two girls in swings at a park. One girl was swinging for all she was worth, laughing as the wind blew her hair back. The other girl was sitting motionless in her swing, tapping away on her phone. Another one showed a young woman enjoying the ocean as it raced onto the shore and back again, while her friend was turned away from the scene, talking loudly and excitedly about some mundane story about a box! The last one I'll mention showed a bowling alley and a teenager getting a strike. When she came bouncing back to the seats, no one looked up from their phones to congratulate her!

Do you know there is a wedding cake topper with bride and groom both texting behind each others' back? It's supposed to be funny, but a YouTube video shows a bride texting as she walks down the aisle on her father's arm. Yikes!

Having mentioned FaceBook, that brings up my problem: Being on the computer too long! The pastor at our former church calls it, "absent presence;" anything that takes your mind away from the people who are with you. It can be the computer, television, even reading. We just have to remember that real people are much more important than media, and that conversation is an art we mustn't let die out.